by Glen L. Bledsoe
Real aliens do not appears as lights in the sky. What would be the point? Instead they leave life-like leggy female decoys in public parks to attract male members of our species. Once captured the aliens (intent on improving their gastroenterological skills) probe males using the port of entry where the sun don't shine.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
I have no idea how old this LP record album is, but I picked it up at a yard sale. Ten cents. And it wasn't cracked or scratched all that bad. I know it looks like a reject from a library book sale, but there are actually some pretty good songs and poems on here. I'm no expert, but I think there's a song on here played with a musical comb. That's what it sounds like to me anyhow. Okay, so the banjo playing isn't so good, but if it was tuned it would be acceptable. Anyway the "Welcoming Sisters" (from Columbus, Ohio) did a pretty good job back in the day. Real DIY for sure, and I think they deserve some respect. I wonder how old they are now. They're probably not even alive. That's sad.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
It is the latest diet fad to hit the already quirky array of dietary restrictions and bizarre cuisines. Celebrities across several continents swear that it has helped them reduce ugly body fat, lowered their blood pressure and helped improve their health in countless ways.
But where is the research? Doubtless one can dig up a Nobel Laureate to support just about any dietary claim, but doesn’t it seem more than a little crazy to eat parts of broken robots? Think of the wear on one’s molars.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
We need to honor people for who they are, what they have accomplished and what they have learned rather than for a brief phase in their sexual development. This picture of Gina Schwartz depicts a woman who has earned recognition for her intellectual and educational accomplishments and respect for her positive influence on the leaders of several continents. The world is a better place for Ms. Schwartz. We are all lucky to have lived during her lifetime.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
Recently released on parole Emil Bruzek has apparently broken into the Art Museum and Gift Shoppe of Paris (Illinois) to repaint “Smiling Blond” by famed photorealist painter Clark Near. The portrait of personality Denise Deny famed for her portrayal of Benita Poole in the screen adaptation of “Benjie the Acrobat” video game and its successive sequels is now undergoing restoration under the skillful eye of Jonathan James, the well-known art restorer who plays a detective in the TV series “Casey Benjamin, Supernatural Investigator.”
by Glen L. Bledsoe
"The Master Milliner" by William Thomas Pusekat circa 1720 depicts Catherine Bread (sometimes spelled Braid) winning the hat design competition in London for the 10th year in a row. It is unknown who the figure second from the right is. A judge perhaps who did not agree with the decision or perhaps a competitor.
So you got a complaint about something. Maybe you bought a used car and it’s a piece of junk. You try to take it back, but the salesman brushes you off. Or maybe your neighbor’s dog barks all night and the police don’t want to do nothing about it. Or maybe there are laws to protect innocent people that just aren’t getting enforced. If you complain on Facebook or some other pansy social media platform you’re bound to get trolled by some kid who doesn’t even shave yet. So instead you call Terrence and Jimbo. And guess what? They just talk to the guys and hardly ever have to hurt anybody to get their cooperation. And the best part is the Mr. Parnelli keeps them on contract, so it don’t cost you a dime. What's to complain about?
Many of you are already familiar with the story of Emil Bruzek, the Repainter of Prague, an artist who was repeatedly rejected by galleries until in his frustration he broke into museums throughout Europe and during the night painted over canvases with images of his own. Initially the alterations were subtle and went unnoticed, but in his growing frustration for recognition his repainting grew more and more fantastic until they at last gained attention.
Pictured above is one of Emils’ repaintings. Left: “Woman with Cossack Hat” by Remi Vakowskivitch, Right: Emil Bruzek’s reworking.
Several groups are demanding Bruzek be released from prison stating that the jail space is needed for oil company executives.
"American Garlic" by Woodrow Grant (1938) is one of the most famous paintings of all time and certainly the most famous of the 20th century. It is instantly recognizable and has been the subject of countless parodies and pastiches of which viewers have doubtless grown tired of. It depicts a garlic farmer with his three daughters standing in front of their home. The models for the painting were Gasper French, a local used car salesman, and Grant's three nieces who, according to them "Uncle Woody promised to take us to Marshall Fields in Chicago for a shopping trip." Whether that trip happened is the subject of some dispute. Marianne, one of his nieces remembers the trip, but the other two deny that it ever took place. The painting purchased in 1939 by the Chicago Painting and Sculpture Museum for a mere $150 even taking inflation into account is worth several times that today. Wise investing!
by Glen L. Bledsoe
Sundays from 9:45 to 10:10 am you can attend church services at Clyde’s. Afterwards, if you have a mind to, you can discuss scripture over a friendly game of cards, and you can get right with Jesus while quenching your thirst with.a cool one. As the good book says, “Water is for bathing and milk is for babies.” There might even be time for the singing of a hymn.
If it takes a little innocent adult entertainment and companionship to bring some religion into folks’ lives then Clyde’s Saloon offers a spiritual service without equal.
Yes, they're cute. And it does seem cruel to leave them chained up outside the store, but humans (unless otherwise trained) are just not appropriate for commercial indoor spaces. For one thing they are gullible, superstitious and are prone to making bad decisions based on their emotions. So while they make excellent servants and are loyal, it's best to leave them where they can be the least disruptive. Enjoy your humans at home
The Artists Readable Wrangle Museum of Art made headlines in the late 20th century when thieves disguised as mimes stole the John Smear Veneer painting “The Performance” (Dutch: Het optreden). Note the empty space on the right wall where the painting used to hang. Needless to say since then security measures have been upgraded. Inasmuch as mimes have the natural ability to bypass digital security systems (remember they don’t make a sound) the museum installed occult measures which have thus far been quite successful.
The primary implementation is the soul flypaper (note the rectangle between the two windows on the left), which thus far has captured more than a dozen souls of would-be thieves and converted them (more or less) into living paintings. The bait on the rear wall is the John Term Brand painting “Men in Yellow.” Some find sight of the trapped souls disturbing and some believe it to be cruel and unusual punishment, but others believe that spending eternity in the view of great art to be no punishment whatsoever. Henry Schilder, the museum’s director pointed out that museum attendance has increased ten-fold since the installation of the flypaper and credits the presence of the trapped souls for much of the increase.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
This device may look like the familiar typewriter found on desktops in households around the world, but in fact this little gem serves a different purpose. It is a rare ChroniCo Time Writer. Instead of being used to type words on paper, pressing its bewildering arrangement of keys allows you to change the present and the future by rewriting the past. First developed by Fascists to rewrite history in their favor during the 20th century this particular model is in poor repair and is limited in its capacity to do little more than command/control-Z to undo whatever you’ve just done in the previous five minutes. Which can be useful if you’ve just knocked over the honey-pot in the kitchen or accidentally backed over your neighbors dog with you car.
bj Glen L. Bledsoe
In this scene from the 1931 movie “Quill of the Crow” Dr. Quill (played by Raymond Massey, right) is preparing to place a mind probe on federal agent Hector Grain (played by Hans Conrad, seated) William Plough (played by Boris Karloff, left) holds Grain firmly in place while Dr. Quill prepares his infernal device.
By Martin Sercombe
In the quaint English village of Woodchester, there is an annual country dance that has been a tradition for over 300 years. The dance, known as the "Woodchester Wobble," is held on the summer solstice, and the villagers gather in the town square to participate in the festivities.
Before the dance begins, each dancer must take a sip from a small bottle of pickled herring juice, which is said to bring good luck. As the music begins, the dancers start to move in unison, performing a slow, wobbly dance that involves a lot of shuffling and twirling. Then a group of villagers dressed as giant bees will swarm around the dancers, buzzing loudly and flapping their wings.
At the height of the dance, a large pie is brought out and placed on a pedestal in the centre of the square. The dancers then form a circle around the pie and, with great solemnity, begin to chant in unison.
As they chant, the pie begins to rise slowly into the air. The dancers continue to chant, their voices growing louder and more intense, until the pie is floating high above the village, suspended in the air by some unseen force.
No one knows exactly how the Pie in the Sky ceremony began, but legend has it that it dates back to the time of the druids, who believed that the pie represented the sun, and that its ascent into the sky symbolized the beginning of summer.
by Glen L. Bledsoe
As the light of the full moon struck Peter the Spider who had bitten the hand of a young man (as only a friendly warning for getting too close) recently exposed to gamma rays, Peter became aware of a change taking place in his body. He grew to the size of a human with intelligence, human speech and a sudden urge to engage in social media!
Your doctor has spend countless hours and a small fortune learning the best practices of medicine and the science of biology to provide you with the very best that modern science can to make sure you and your family stay in the very best health possible. But above and beyond knowledge, skill and expertise your doctor also knows that having a warm bedside manner sometimes means just as much to your well being as all the pills in a pharmacy.
