Woman with Medallion

By Glen L. Bledsoe

Last November agents of INTERPOL raided the home of Luigi Tracino, an Italian long suspected of possessing a number of purloined paintings including Vermeer's "Het concert" stolen from the Gardner Museum in Boston in 1990. While the famed Verneer sadly was not among the recovered masterworks authorities were surprised to find a painting by Eyk Van Jenz titled "Woman with Medallion" heretofore only known from descriptions in the journal of Henk Saefert, one of Van Jenz's many students, from the late 1400's. The painting itself historians believed had been burned in a fire in the town of Haafsdorf in what is now Germany in the early 17th century. How the painting survived and where it has stored since is a bigger mystery still.

Henk Tollmann one of INTERPOL's art theft experts said, "The painting appears to be in good condition for its age. As to its authenticity I will leave it up to the experts."

Indeed the painting has caused controversy since photographs of it first began to appear in the media. While the rendering of the woman in the painting appears to be very much in the style of Van Janz, the pendant hanging around her neck has caused some to declare it a hoax. Pictured on the pendant is a portrait of what appears to be 20th century pop star Elvis Presley.

Those who believe the painting to be authentic claim that the similarity between the portrait on the image and Elvis is a coincidence. Others claim that it is a master forger who is having a bit of fun with the public.

Either way the controversy has elevated the status of the painting beyond what might be expected without it. The painting will go on the auction block at Christie's in the spring where bidding is expected to start at US$70 million but could bring in much more.

The Unfortunate Store

 

By Glen L. Bledsoe 

ASTORIA, ORE - Experts say that these new businesses unfairly target poor neighborhoods and the economically disadvantaged. Almost overnight businesses that buy, sell and trade misfortunes are springing up like mushrooms after a rain. Where did it all start and how do these businesses impact our communities?

Beaverton businessman Philip Henri-Bones, owner of a large chain of laundromats in the Pacific Northwest and newly opened "The Unfortunate Store," (pictured) in Astoria says he got the idea after reading James Joyce's short story "The Sin Eaters." The notion came to him that those who wish to shed the emotional weight of their personal tragedies might shift them to someone else-for a price. What makes this so devastating to our poor neighborhoods is that minorities who are well used to things going pear-shaped are taking on these burdens in exchange for quick cash at an alarming rate.

Dr. Jean Sheldon, Professor of Statistical Burdens and Calamities at the University of Oregon said, "The poor are experienced in bad luck and so they are more emotionally fortified when things go wrong. The well-to-do are taking advantage of this trait and in exchange for significant fees are shifting their guilt and social burdens onto the poor."

This has attracted the attention of the Oregon Fortunes Commission (OFC). Spokesperson Earl Wittles says he believes that laws are probably being violated, but admitted that this is a legal gray area. State Senator James Coville told reporters he has plans to introduce legislation to address these matters in the upcoming session in Salem.

The managers of two of the largest chains "Tragedy Depot" and "Tough Luck World" did not return phone calls from our reporters.

The Bather

 By Glen L. Bledsoe 

This illustration depicts the legend of the moment before Dooth, the leader of the Funnelbeaker peoples, first gazes upon Mar-Thol (who is about to disrobe to bath in the Nile) and becomes besotted with her beauty. They marry only later to be cursed with immortality with the memories of each other's face erased by Arka-Arkitutti, the Witch-Queen of the Sea Peoples. For eternity they criss-cross the planet searching for one another with aching hearts.

Somebody needs to write an opera around this.